I am honored to have a guest post today from an inspiring woman after my own heart!
Babychaser, as she likes to be called, is a homeschooling mommy to 4 blessings (5 and under), wife to 1 wonderful husband, and follower of the Lord Jesus. She is the keeper of their little home where she cooks from scratch, grinds her own flour, chases babies, and hires out the cleaning (for now), trainer of those precious souls, and dreams with her husband of living on a little farm one day. She blogs at Chasing Babies... Growing in Grace about all of the above and more.
I have been incredibly challenged with her series this month on Intentional Parenting and knew a lot of my readers would benefit from her wisdom. Enjoy the post and be sure to visit her at BabyChaser.com!
Intentional Parenting
I was simply honored when Beth asked me to share with you, her readers, about Intentional Parenting. I've been enjoying her series and getting to know her a little bit through her blog.
When she invited me to share with you all, she did so with a little light hearted confession: "Parenting in general is something I was confident in... until our oldest turned two." I have to admit that when I read it I laughed with her, but I'd read it wrong. What I thought she said was... "Parenting in general is something I was confident in... until our oldest two."
I thought it was hilarious because, of course, she only has two children. But really, I was agreeing with her. Somehow I'd twisted it around in my head and, for myself, came up with something like this:
"I had this parenting thing all figured out until my last four were born."
So let's get started... Hi, I'm the mother of four children, 5 and under, and most days I'm still learning what it means to parent them. As I've spent this last month focusing on Intentional Parenting, I've been reminded that parenting well is hard.
Parenting intentionally means doing it every day. Sacrificing my own desires. Getting up off the couch. Keeping my cool. And all of this whether I've had a full night's sleep or not.
Parenting intentionally means looking to the Word of God to guide me. Thinking Biblically about my children. And dying to self.
So how can we get started? I'd like to share three things we can do to get started in parenting intentionally!
1.Start each morning giving your children to God!
They aren't yours anyway, right? God has entrusted them to us to train up for His glory... for His will. Whether it is before ever stepping out of bed, in a quiet "devotions" time on the couch, or while sitting with a two year old on the potty and a baby in your arms, talk to Him. "Lord, these are your children. Help me to be intentional today in how I train them. Help every moment to bring You glory. Amen."
It can be as easy as that. And Jesus tells us that whatever we ask in His name, He will do.
If you can't do this all day, at least strive for part of the day. When I turn off my computer and set aside the phone (we don't have a TV or that would be off too), leaving myself in the dark ages, without reach of the outside world, I am able to be completely here... with my children. This opens the door to being intentional! It's so much easier if you can at least unplug during "kid hours".
3. Keep them with you!
It can be as easy as that. And Jesus tells us that whatever we ask in His name, He will do.
2. Unplug!
This is one of the keys to being intentional in your parenting. If you aren't with them, you have no way of knowing what they are doing, not to mention no way of controlling what they are doing or to what they are being exposed. You may choose to keep it as simple as staying together as you go about your days or as extreme as choosing not to use babysitters, keeping them in the church service with you and staying together throughout your days.
It seems so simplistic to say that this is all you need, but understand, these are three things to get you started. This is your jumping off point. From here you have the ability to train them, talk to them about God and his commands, build relationships and whatever else you want to do... and all intentionally.
This is Day 28 of 31. Click here to see the entire series.
Thank you following along on our journey to simplicity & contentment. Please be sure to learn about our family, like our page on Facebook, and visit the right column to subscribe to our posts :)
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want."
Philippians 4:12
God bless!
I love the reminder to unplug! Our toddler already seems to know how to use a smartphone and a computer even though we're very mindful about his exposure to screen time. The technology is wonderful for him to be able to video chat with his far away family but I'm so glad for those moments of quiet and watching him learn.
ReplyDeleteI agree with the unplug statement. I can really see a difference in my son when I've been online too much, and now he's learned to say "Mommy, please turn off the computer." When he says that, I immediately unplug and let him know how great it is that he recognizes his feelings and communicates them. It seems to be working! Now, to get him to bed earlier so I can just take care of everything I need to do while he's asleep!!
ReplyDeleteIt's amazing how much time and attention the computer (and the internet especially) can eat up and rob from our homes.
ReplyDeleteThe unplugging is what I've had to do lately to be present in my life. I've struggled with being organized enough to set aside time that is just for me to "work" on the computer. That struggle won over with me being so burnt out that I had to just take more than a week long break from being present in my "online life". I think it made a world of difference in my parenting and especially with my husband. I'm currently trying to find a good way to balance my family responsibilities with my passion for writing and blogging.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing Jenna! It is such a blessing for us to hear that we are not the only ones that struggle with the balance!
ReplyDeleteI LOVE this post! I definitely struggle with balance between work, baby, husband, and all other things. The unplugging advice is my favorite. I need to focus more on what matters.
ReplyDeleteIt does seem so simplistic, but when so many around us are choosing the opposite it is very easy to think that it is normal. Thank you for this beautiful reminder. We have been sans babysitters for about six months and it has been unexpectedly wonderful! I am connecting more deeply with my children and things are MORE peaceful- this was surprising to me. What a gift parenting connectedly and intentionally is!
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I've been working at unplugging when I'm around my toddler, too. If she's awake and I'm with her, I try not to be on my smart phone or the computer. I don't even turn on the TV. Sometimes I turn on the radio so we can dance. I can still do better about being away from my phone, though. I find myself too often grabbing it to check facebook or my e-mail. :/
ReplyDeleteSince I work full-time away from her, I try to spend as much as time as possible with her. We rarely have a need for a babysitter, since if we do go out, we take her with us. That is mostly because I feel like I should be with her when I'm not at work. And I WANT to be with her! But lately I'm reazling that I need some alone time with my husband, too, so we're trying to work on more date nights without the baby. Its a balancing act. (: But I definitely don't just dump her off on other people so I can have time to myself, and we keep her with us in church, even though there's a nursery available. I feel like she needs to learn to sit quietly and be with us during the service. She does really well for a 22 month old! (:
Thank you for commenting, Nikki. As a SAHM I need to remember to treasure and value all the time I have with my kids! Sometimes it's easy to "clock out" mentally because I figure I have time to engage with them later.. but I know it's a blessing to be with them!
DeleteI imagine it would be very difficult to have to be away from my children during the days... for any reason. We are blessed that our children can be with one of us all the time and we have control over hwhat and who is influencing them One of the ways my husband and I have time alone while also not using babysitters is to do so while they are in bed. Staying in is cheaper anyway. If you want a romantic meal? Feed the kids early and put them to bed (skip nap time that day to help bedtime go more smoothly) so you can enjoy a candle light dinner for two. Though we don't usually do it up like that, sometimes we put a pizza in the oven and eat it on the couch while cuddled up to watch a movie. Or we bring out dessert while playing a game after they're in bed.
ReplyDeleteThose are the best date nights :)
DeleteIf we ever go out without kids I usually spend the entire time worried about or missing them anyways!
We've been struggling to unplug here. I found myself resorting to the television far more often than I would like and now we are trying to break those habits as a family.
ReplyDelete