Pages

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Continuing to Have Faith and Saying "No" Out of Necessity

I know a lot of young families have money struggles.
Although I think it's possible to avoid if you have the proper guidance and plan carefully; I also think it's an important season of life to experience.
Tommy & I back in 2010
When Tommy and I were first married, we were broke. 
Seriously, we had a total of 4 forks in our kitchen which we had bought from the Dollar Store when we ran out of the disposable set my mom had given us - that's all we could afford to buy. Those first 12-15 months of marriage were the absolute hardest financially. Our number one goal was just to pay every bill and stay out of debt. And we did. We weren't even close to perfect with our money (and we still aren't) but we made sacrifices and God provided for us. 

After a year and a half we finally felt like we not only had our feet on the ground, but we had decent traction and could start to "live a little". So we began to build our savings to buy a home.
Our front entryway
Two and a half months ago, our dream finally came true.

We bought our first house, with no other debt whatsoever and our emergency fund still in the bank! Our hard work and sacrifice had paid off. We finally felt like everything was coming together. We had a home (our fourth in 2.5 years) to settle our family in, begin to fulfill our homesteading dreams on, and it was perfect.

Two days after we closed on our house, Tommy lost his job.
Although we've been blessed that multiple times in the past few years, Tommy could leave his job for a better opportunity God provided us, this is the first time ever that we had lost one.

As much as I try to be optimistic and have patience, the truth is I'm human. We've been okay the past two months, we have our savings. But lately I'm impatient, frustrated, and annoyed.

I know it could be a hundred times worse than it is. But it's really hard to feel like everything we've been dreaming about doing and waiting to accomplish is on hold. Again.


It's really hard to feel guilty about spending money on anything that's not a need. 

I can't justify spending $6 on new batting so I can start another sewing project. It's not a need.

I can't justify buying more FCLO, even though it was 40% off and I believe it's the reason I haven't even had a cold yet this winter, It's not a need.

I can't even justify getting Will's 1st birthday pictures taken... not even at Walmart or JCPenney. It's not a need.

I can't justify spending unnecessarily because I don't know how long it will be before we have income. 

Normally, I'm all about being frugal and not spending large amounts of money - but it's different when you are watching this huge (to us) amount of savings you worked so hard to build just melt away. And it's different than when we used our down payment savings - now we're not even able to do enjoyable things or have something tangible to show for it; we're just trying to stay warm and eat.

Even though saying "No" has been a struggle, I am so thankful for what the Lord has opened our eyes to during this situation.
  • We learned that a career field we thought Tommy was passionate about pursuing is not where he should be and not where God wants him
  • We learned how to be a one car family and we kind of enjoy it actually
  • We learned how to make Christmas simple and special without money - and why it's important
  • We've learned that the upgrades we had planned on making to our home, aren't as important as other ones we could spend money on when we have it (um, hello new windows. I'm freezing here!)
  • We've learned the weaknesses in our marriage from being together 24/7 for 2.5 months straight and can address them
  • We've learned that Satan will use your moments of weakness and desperation to try and pull you away from God and the faith in His plan
  • We've learned that Tommy is a hundred times better at getting the laundry done than I am. Honestly, when he is working again I am worried nothing will ever be clean - I am the worst!

Right now, we can only pray for a new job (in Michigan none-the-less) and continue to take care of our needs.
I don't know what God's plan is. I don't know how long it will take. But I whole heartedly trust He has a reason and if we continue to trust in Him, He will take care of His children.


Thank you following along on our journey to simplicity & contentment. Please be sure to learn about our family, like our page on Facebook, and visit the right column to subscribe to future posts!

Linking up with the Barn Hop!

14 comments:

  1. I know first hand how difficult this can be. I've lived it for many years. My best advice is to stay in His word and keep praying for wisdom about your finances. When I'm feeling especially down about it I'll make a list of everything I have to be thankful for until I'm not feeling so blue. I'll keep your family in my prayers! Keep your head up :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your encouragement - it means a lot :)

      God bless!

      Delete
  2. Hi Beth!
    I have been visiting from the barn hop, and I truly enjoy your blog. I was recently recognized as a new blogger by being nominated for the Liebster New Blog Award. I wanted to share that honor by nominating your blog. Swing on over to www.standupongrace.wordpress.com for a visit, and to see your nomination! I feel your frustration. Finding the right job, sometimes any job, can be a perilous process. We have been there, too. Stay strong my girl, and lean on your faith. I love how you are counting your blessings....btw, you should take Will's 1st bday pictures. You, as his mama, will be able to capture his little personality like no other photographer. For everything there is a season....now is the season of creativity, and finding the joy in everyday blessings!
    Love & Prayers~ Wendy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Wendy! I'm sure we will continue to capture him "informally" and keep those pictures to remember - you're right!

      Thank you for visiting :)

      Delete
  3. Thank you for sharing your story. Your faith is inspiring. God has brought you this far, and He will not leave you. I will be praying that God brings your husband to that perfect job!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I imagine that is so very discouraging when you let it be! Sorry to hear about the job loss. What a great opportunity to learn how to live simply through necessity!

    And I get the whole laundry thing. Whenever my husband is in charge of the house stuff, he does way better than I do! Poor guy. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. You are amazing. I am praying for you friend. May God guide you both to your next adventure very soon. Your faith is inspiring. God bless!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I appreciate the prayers, Crys :) love to you!

      Delete
  6. So sorry to hear of your hubby's job loss. About 2 years ago we went without a job for 6 months. My husband felt like he needed to resign from his job. After much prayer he (we) took that BIG leap of faith. We had 10 of our 14 children still living at home, plus a teen girl that had no place to go. I can tell you that those 6 months were one of the happiest times of our lives. We saw God supply in so many ways that we never thought possible. We had no savings, no unemployment, no government help of any kind. We had God and God alone. What a great testimony it was for our children to see the hand of God at work.

    Don't lose heart, God has a perfect plan for your family! By the way, my husband's decision was for the best! It worked out so it would preserve a job for him at the college he was at the year before! (That story is another work of God's hand!)

    Praying for you and your family as your wait on God!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I agree with stand upon grace who suggested you take your son's 1st Birthday photos, and I was going to suggest it myself when I read that it had already been suggested. Your creativity will shine... and as his mama, I expect that you will get him to laugh and giggle like no stranger can and his true personality will come shining through! You get to make a memory while saving money.

    I also agree with anonymous who encouraged you to keep giving. That was another first impression I had and was glad to see one of your readers suggested it.

    Now why would we want to burden you about your giving when you need to receive in this hour? Let me put it this way...can I go out to my garden and pick apples if I haven't planted an apple tree? Can I pick tomatoes if I only planted okra this year? Sowing and reaping is God's design.

    In my own life, if I need groceries then I sow groceries into someone's life (along with the word of God to encourage them). If I only give to ministries that pass out food and no scripture, then I've done nothing to sew up the holes in peoples pockets and their "condition of need" continues. It is the WORD that sews up the holes in the pockets and stops lack. So I would encourage you to sow in the areas you have need. If your husband needs a job, he could volunteer a bit of labor, he could proof someone else's resume to help them get a good job, etc. If you need grace, extend grace, etc. By faith, sow... and start thanking God that in His time you know there is going to be a harvest. His plan is to give you a hope and a future and He loves you so very much. How wonderful that you can cast ALL your cares on Him because He cares for you.

    ReplyDelete
  8. We've had our ups and downs with jobs as well. But like you said had never lost one before. I work with a wellness company, from home, that's based out of Utah and have heard so many awful stories about people losing their jobs or bussiness. They found our company and are successful again. From selling bread in the church parking lot to make ends meet, to now having a reliable paycheque in the mail every single month. I just want to leave you with a website to check into, if that's okay. I've seen the desperation and hopelessness and now the promise and gatefulness to be given the opportunity to make a difference.... www.enhancinglivesathome.com/rita
    Blessings to your family from mine.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'll take Will's first birthday pictures for free! As long as you promise that you will love them, cherish them and share them! You know how to get a hold of me! -Jenni S.

    ReplyDelete